When
Is it Time to Help Your Aging Parent?
exerpted from the book Helping Your Aging Parent
Sooner
or later most of us will have to step in and help our parents. Often, if
you live near your parents and have a close relationship with them, you
may just gradually fall into a pattern where you begin to take a larger
and more active role in your parents’ day-to-day life. But that’s
generally not the case. Most of us live busy, active lives, and our parents
do too. Or so we may think – especially if our parents are still married
or have remarried. We talk on the phone and visit as often as we can, but
our lives are going in very different directions from our parents’.
While we’re speeding into middle age trying to make our mark on the
world, raising our children and being productive adults with expanding horizons,
our parents are slowing down. And too often, we don’t even notice
it until something happens and suddenly, one or both of our parents need
our help When
that occurs, many of us don’t know where or how to begin. And in
truth, we may not want to begin. After all, to take on the responsibility
of caretaker to a parent is a difficult adjustment. This is the person
who took care of you, the person you always depended on, the one you turned
to when you needed help or advice or encouragement. Reversing that role
isn’t always easy – for either of you. You may both resist,
or even deny, the need for as long as possible. I know from experience,
because that’s how it was with my mother and me. It takes time to
get comfortable with the idea. Unfortunately, time may not be what you
have.
Helping
Your Aging Parent may be one of the only guides available today
that takes you step-by-step through the entire process of dealing with
the responsibilities having an aging parent places on you. Much of what
is written actually comes from the author’s own experience of taking
on the care of his own parent, while maintaining a family and a busy career.
The advice walks you through the health care, housing, legal, nursing
home, and hospice systems. You'll find tips to help you avoid the pitfalls
the author fell in as well as assurance when you are doing the best you
can.
This book includes
all the tools you’ll need to help you work on one of life’s
biggest challenges — caring for an elderly parent who may not appreciate,
or even recognize your help. You’ll find down-to-earth advice on
dealing with problems that occur at each stage of the experience. Includes
a FREE CD-ROM with all the forms and checklists from the book. Open the
forms you need with your word processing program, for either IBM-style
or Macintosh computers. Change them to suit your needs, fill them out
and print. Or open in Adobe Acrobat Reader and fill out by hand. Also
includes links to valuable Websites for more information on each subject
listed in the book. 160 pages,
8-1/2 x 11, Only $19.95.
Find out More!
Contents of
Helping Your Aging Parent
1: How Do
You Know Your Parent Needs Your Help?
Awakening to the Problem
Admitting the Need
How to Determine if there's Really a Problem
Parent Health Evaluation Checklist
Make Sure Your Parent Sees a Doctor
When to Step in and Take Charge
Family Enlistment Form
2: The Doctor
Visit
Evaluating Your Parent's Current Health Care
Prescription Drug List
Prescription Drug Web Sites
Keep Your Perspective
Getting Background Information for the Doctor
Symptoms Observed and Questions Checklist
Family Medical History Checklist
Checklist of Things to Bring on Doctor Exam
Following Up After the Doctor Exam
Accepting the Results
Programs to Help Seniors
3: Signing
Up For The Future
Trusts
Setting Up a Trust
Specialized Trusts
Who Needs a Trust?
Who Doesn't Need a Trust?
Power of Attorney for Health Care
Durable Power of Attorney for Finances
What Happens if Your Parent Won't Sign?
Life Directives
Sample Life Directive
Sample Living Will
Death Directives and Last Requests
Personal Information Fact Sheet
4: Housing
-- Finding the Best Option for Your Parent
The Four Choices for Moving
Option 1: Moving Your Parent in With You
Building a Granny Flat
Option 2: Have Someone Come to Your Parent
Roommates
Rental Application Form
Live-in Care
Roommate Agreement Form
Website of National Organizations for Housing
Option 3: Foster Care
Option 4: Senior Apartments
Evaluation Checklist for a Senior Apartment
Option 5: Independent Living Retirement Homes
Evaluation Checklist for Independent Homes
Monthly Income and Expense Worksheet
Assisted Living Care
Personal Financial Worksheet
Option 6: Three-Part Care Facilities
Option 7: A Board and Care Home
Checklist for Residential Board and Care Facility
Living With Your Housing Decision
5: Surviving the Hospital
Getting Your Parent Admitted
How to Prevent an Adverse Event
Get to Know the Nurses
Drug Allergy Notice
Preventing a Drug Allergy
How to Prevent Bedsores
Privacy Notice
Surviving an Operation
Release From the Hospital
Dealing With Your Feelings
Studies on the Power of Prayer
6: Dealing
With Dementia and Other Mental Disorders
Identifying Dementia and Other Mental Disorders
Most Common Types of Dementia
Warning Signals of Dementia or Mental Illness
The Doctor Visit
The Memory Test
Dealing With Doctor Denial
The Geriatric Assessment Evaluation
What Causes Dementia?
Nothing to Fear but Fear Itself
Learning to Live With the Stigma
Advanced Housing Needs
Dealing With the Decline
Communicating
Dealing With Wandering
Incontinence
Dealing With Angry or Agitated Behavior
Terminal or End Stage Dementia
7: Nursing
Homes
When Your Parent May Need a Nursing Home
What Nursing Homes Do
Finding a Nursing Home
Nursing Home Checklist
The Secret State Inspection Report
Making Your Parent Comfortable
Handling Major Problems or Concerns
Attending Assessment Meetings
Assessment Meeting Questions
Helping With Rehabilitation
Nursing Home Expenses
Sources of Income
Asset Protection
Visiting an Asset Protection Lawyer
Visiting a Financial Planner
Nursing Home Alternatives
Don't Expect an Overnight Cure
8: Hospice,
Death and Funerals
What is Hospice?
How do You Find a Good Hospice?
Hospice Checklist
Signing Up for Hospice
Sample Do Not Resuscitate Order
Changes That Appear as Death Approaches
Giving Permission to Go
Signals That the End is Near
The Final Moment
Getting Through the Details
Post-Death Checklist
Planning a Funeral or Memorial Service
Mortuary/Cremation Fact List
9: Using the Disk in the Back of This Book
Index
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Diabetes
Linked to Alzheimer's
Researchers
from Chicago's Rush University Medical Center have just finished
a five-year study involving 824 Catholic nuns. The study concluded
that diabetics had a 65% increased risk of developing Alzheimer's
or vascular dementia compared to non-diabetics. The study showed
that poorly controlled diabetes also affects brain functioning and
mental cognition. Diabetes can be controlled by insulin, excercise,
and good eating habits. The study was not conclusive, as other factors
such as strokes may have affected the outcome.
Supplements
of Vitamins C and E cut Alzheimer's Risk in Study
A five-year study
of 4,740 participants was aged 65 or older was conducted on the
value of taking over-the-counter vitamins C and E. The study determined
that participants taking 1000 iu of vitamin E, and 500 milligrams
of vitamin C a day as supplemental vitamins, had a 78% lower risk
of getting Alzheimer's disease. The study was created by the John
Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health.
More
Health Discoveries
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